Day 215: The Courage to Continue

Day 215: The Courage to Continue 

“Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.” —Seneca

Today marks 215 days of sobriety, 215 days of facing the world without the veil of alcohol to dull the sharp edges of reality. But sobriety, while a monumental achievement, has not been a panacea. It has not washed away the deep-seated feelings of despair or the gnawing loneliness that clings stubbornly to my spirit.

I confess to you all, and perhaps more importantly, to myself, that I am not happy. Happiness feels like a foreign land, one I’ve read about but never visited. The joy in life seems just beyond my grasp, obscured by clouds of doubt and pain. I tell myself stories that Hope—both the emotion and the person who embodies so much of what I yearn for—will never return to my life, that I am destined to navigate this world in isolation.

The truth is, some days, simply continuing to breathe feels like a Herculean task. The silence that I once thought I desired now feels oppressive, a reminder of the void where laughter and shared dreams used to reside. The isolation I’ve endured hasn’t just scarred me; at times, it feels as though it has scooped out parts of my soul, leaving caverns that echo with the memories of better days.

I keep showing up, though. I keep living, keep breathing, keep walking forward because that is what we do, isn’t it? We fight. We struggle. We endure. And through this act of living, this daily decision to not let the darkness win, I find the smallest slivers of light. It’s in these slivers that I discover not happiness, but something perhaps more valuable: a quiet strength, a silent resolve, a recognition that even in the depths of despair, there is something in me that refuses to surrender.

So today, I share this not to cast a shadow but to shine a light on the reality that sometimes, living is an act of courage. It is a declaration that despite the overwhelming odds, despite the pain and the fear, we are still here. We are still fighting. And that alone is worth acknowledging.

To anyone else feeling the weight of their own battles, know this: your courage does not go unnoticed. Each day you continue is a testament to your strength. And though the path may be steep, we walk it together—one step, one punch, one round at a time.

Day 215,

One Step. One Punch. One Round.🌹

—Your Fellow Traveler