Day 207: Ready to Fight Again
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Day 207: Ready to Fight Again
“You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.” —Margaret Thatcher
Today marks a poignant moment in my journey—standing at a crossroads faced with solitude once again, a scenario that once led me down a path of despair and near destruction. However, this time, the silence around me, while deafening, does not bring old fears alone. It brings a new resolve.
The last time I was truly alone, I faltered. I lost pieces of myself to isolation, to addiction, and to the shadows of my mind that seemed too dense to navigate. But those battles, though lost, were not in vain. They taught me about my vulnerabilities, about the strength of my spirit, and most importantly, about the necessity of preparation and support.
Tomorrow, I will attend my first meeting since getting sober. It’s a testament to the fact that I heard enough the first time to know that what was shared in those rooms held truth, held hope. Despite the terrifying grip of the unknown, I am more equipped now, more aware of the triggers, and more appreciative of the lifelines available to me.
I am sober. I am present. And I am terrified. Yet, it’s a different kind of fear this time—not one that paralyzes, but one that motivates. I acknowledge the challenges that lie ahead in the quiet moments and the loud ones. I know too well the danger of boredom and the allure of old habits. But today, I stand ready to fight, not just to battle the urges, but to win over them.
Being prepared has given me a shield and being aware has armed me with a sword. Though the fight against addiction is never truly over, I am committed to engaging in this battle, equipped with better tools and fortified by past defeats.
Each day sober is a victory, each meeting attended a reinforcement of my defenses, and each moment of reflection a strategy session for the days to come. I may have to fight some battles more than once, but I am ready to win them now.
Day 207,
One Step. One Punch. One Round. 🌹
—Your Fellow Traveler